A World of Tehrror
MINE.

JM:
-Finishing up my shower and throwing on the same pair of leathers I wore the night before, making sure that @XhexBDBFM’s phone is securely in one pocket, and the sticky notes in the other. I walk over to my window, and look out into the gardens. Was I really going to leave the compound without @Qhuinn_BDBFM again? For my female, yeah. Nothing could keep me here, not even some decree from @KingWrath_BDBFM…. @XhexBDBFM wanted her independence, and she sure as fuck wouldn’t appreciate if a welcome wagon stormed in to #ZeroSum just to return her phone and a few notes… No, I would go alone.-

-Opening the window and dematting to the back alley of #ZeroSum, making my way into the club through the back door, nodding at #Trez and #iAm on the way up to @XhexBDBFM’s mezzanine office, to wait until she returned from her last round of the night.-

Xhex:
*Prowling through #ZeroSum, the petty squabbles and extensive vices of the crowd are calling out to my symphath side. So much lust and greed out on display, and below the surface is all the self-loathing, all the pain and defeat that make these people come here and pretend to be something they’re not. Like single, or wealthy. And a whole lot of idiots want to play tough tonight, which would usually suit me just fine. As it is though the cilices I’m wearing might as well be some fucking lacy garters for all the good they’re doing. My vision keeps getting a wash of red, and threatening to flatten out. I am ready to shove every last person out the door without the inconvenience of opening the damned thing first. That has nothing to do with last call, since I’ve felt that way since the first client walked in. Frowning as I scan the club, I could swear @JM_BDBFM just walked in, but some meathead getting too personal with one of the waitresses out in gen pop catches my eye first. Seeing that two of my bouncers are already on their way to handle the drunk, I move towards VIP to finish clearing out the stragglers and stop halfway up the steps. The Brotherhood table is empty. #Trez’s voice cuts through my earpiece, “He headed up for your office.” Looking across to where the Shadows keep guard on @Rehvenge_BDBFM’s door, I spot the flash of bright green and the hint of a smirk on #Trez’s face. Passing him as I remember too late how to not act like a fawning teenager, I growl.* Shut it. You too. * #iAm holds up his hands in mock surrender despite the grin trying to spread across his face. Deciding there’s no point acting like we don’t all know what’s going on, I finish my circuit of the club and head up to my office, knowing @JM_BDBFM is waiting for me.*

JM:
- Looking around the office, I notice for the first time that it’s barren of everything except for a desk, chair and a few folders strewn on the desktop. Not a picture or plant in sight. Not even a desk clock or office phone. Chuckling to myself, thinking that that shouldn’t be a surprise by now, I turn around at the sound of the door clicking shut behind me. Smirking at you as you stand just inside the doorway, with your arms crossed across your chest, looking perfect in your leathers and muscle shirt. Your body language suggesting that tonight wasn’t too bad a night at the club, but something was doing with you. Keeping my smirk plastered to my face, and signing to you,- Are you missing something?

Xhex:
*Leaning back against the door, I almost give in to the temptation to find out what’s behind your smirk. So I forgot a few things, but nothing that would explain that look on your face. Nothing except the fact that I stupidly forgot my things at your place.* My cilices. These back up ones just aren’t doing their job. And my phone. The rest can stay where it is in case -  *ducking my head before I ask for my own drawer in your room like some bad chick flick cliché * I mean, those are the only things I can’t replace easily. Everything else I have more of at home.

JM:
-Shit, I didn’t see the cilices anywhere in my room… though, I honestly wasn’t looking for them. I hate that you wear those things. I know why you have to, but that doesn’t mean I have to fucking like it. Signing to you as I reach for your phone- Well, I have one of those things. -Holding up the phone- The cilices though, must still be at the compound. Probably somewhere in the PT suite. I’ll find them when I return. There is something else I found though. -Pulling out the sticky notes you kept in your phone and holding them in front of me with the other hand, arching a brow in a silent question, wanting you to explain.-

Xhex:
*Wondering if you’ve already programmed your number into my phone, I know there’s no way I’d be that lucky. I’m going to have to ask for it. Rolling my shoulders at the fact that I’ll have to replace my cilices, because it’s not likely anyone would have thought to save my torture devices, I freeze at the next items you pull out. Why the fuck did I keep your notes in my phone? Oh right, because somewhere along the line all that estrogen decided I needed act a little more like a female. Looking around my office gives me no inspirational excuse to work with. Not that I really know how to explain my actions anyway. Especially the sheets I picked up from the floor of #ZeroSum after I called the Brotherhood to get you.* I kept them. Obviously. *Shit. That sounds so fucking defensive, but I really don’t know how else to handle this.*

JM:
-Tossing your phone to you, still smirking, I sign with my newly free hand- There was one number missing from your contacts list. Don’t worry, I added it for you. *Winking at you, then tending to the bundle of sticky notes, peeling them off each other, one by one and sticking them to your desk. Signing- You saved them all? I’m almost regretting teaching you ASL. It would give me an excuse to leave more notes. -Turning to face you again, pride swelling in my chest, and signing again.- There are quite a few of them here, Xhex. -Was I really teasing you? Yeah, I guess I was. Isn’t that what a male does with their female? Guess I would find out. Soon.-

Xhex:
*Catching my phone, I slide the back open out of habit even though the notes are spread out on my desk. Damn. That thing was getting full. Flipping it over, I scroll through the contacts quickly to your number, then slip the phone into my leathers. Walking over to my desk, I pick up the first note. The only one that’s not a sticky note. The one I rescued from the floor of #ZeroSum where you threw it after I humiliated you in front of @KingWrath_BDBFM. The first time you claimed me as your female. Nodding slowly, I try to match your teasing tone.* What can I say? Somebody kept leaving notes. You never know when you might need to have evidence of your stalker.

JM:
Stalker? -The word left my lips on a silent chuckle, then signing- Is that what you think I am? -Shrugging, then walking over to stand behind you, resting my chin on your shoulder and reaching a hand out in front of you to point at the words “You are my female”, then signing- I would have hoped I was a little bit more than just a stalker to you. -Feeling the change in your body, the tensing of your muscles followed by a slight surrender. I place my hands on your hips and nuzzle into your neck, breathing in your scent. Oh yeah, I was so much more than just a stalker to you. Now, if only you would admit it to yourself.-

Xhex:
*Tensing as you point to your words, all I can see is the drop of red on the page. Fuck, do you even know that symphaths cry blood? Feeling more cocksucking tears trying to start as your breath tickles my neck, I know what you’re looking for. I can’t say it though. Fucking coward. If I say, then it’s real - no going back. Not that you can hide your bonding scent and everything it says for you. Clearing my throat so you don’t hear how much this is affecting me, I fall back on a smartass reply.* Oh, you’re definitely more than a stalker. My symphath side gets to have an entirely different kind of fun with anyone stupid enough to pull that shit. *Turning to face you now that I feel confident I don’t look weepy eyed, I reach up and wrap my arms around the back of your neck.* You want to get out of here? I just have to do a final check of the locks before I can leave.

JM:
-Nodding, of course I want to get out of here. If it meant spending a few hours with you. I’d been spoiled with you in the compound with me the last few weeks. I needed you. Stepping back to follow you out of the door and down to the main level of the club, tailing you as you do one final sweep of the club on your way out the door.-

Xhex:
*Confirming that the club is clear, the lack of @Qhuinn_BDBFM becomes extremely obvious. Not that I can blame you for wanting to ditch your royally appointed babysitter, but I also know you wouldn’t get your ahstrux nohtrum in more trouble by staying the day with me.Locking the door behind us, a smile tugs at the corners of my mouth as I look over at my Ducati.* Let’s ride back to my place. It’s a great night out for it. *Slinging my leg over the seat of my bike, I arch an eyebrow at you as I wait for you to join me.*

JM:
-Smirking, and taking a lap around the bike, I reach the front and lean into the handle bars, keeping one hand free to sign and arching a brow- You think I can fit on that with you? It could be a pretty tight fit. -And you’d definitely feel what’s doing underneath my leathers- Don’t want it to be an uncomfortable ride.

Xhex:
*Chuckling as I resist the urge to tell you to just get on the bitch seat already, I slide forward slightly on the seat.* Plenty of room, and I thought you’d gotten over being shy around me by now.

JM:
-My smirk turning into a grin, I walk around to the rear of the bike and throw my leg over. I’m sure as hell not shy around you anymore. You were mine. No reason for shyness. Taking a tight hold on your waist and positioning myself so your back is pressed to my front, making sure my hips are tight against you, then resting my chin on your shoulder and pressing a kiss to your neck, signalling that I’m ready to go. This should make for an interesting ride.-

Xhex:
*Groaning as you bring your body in close to mine, letting me feel exactly how ready you are, I know I’m going to break some speed limits tonight. Not that I don’t always ignore the posted limits, but tonight I’ll be getting home in record time. I briefly consider heading to my crash pad, but my place on the Hudson is slightly more guest friendly. Gunning the engine, I take the quickest route I know to get out of downtown.*

JM:
-Oh yeah… this was going to be one hell of a ride. Every bump and turn bringing me closer against you, rubbing and grinding. I had to have you. Soon. Watching the scenery around us fly by for what seems like seconds, until you slow down and pull up to a cabin. Dismounting from the bike, and taking you with me, heaving you over my shoulder and storming up the stairs, then setting you down to unlock the door. My hands never left your body as you fumbled with the key, and stumbled across the threshold.-

Xhex:
*Holy shit! No male had ever dared try to fucking manhandle me like that. Fuck if I didn’t find the caveman act hot as hell coming from you though. Between the shock of being carried around like some dainty female and the thick bonding scent filling the air, I’m amazed I even remember I have a key, let alone manage to get the damn thing in the lock. Turning around as soon as we’re through the door, I start undoing your belt as I walk us backwards to the bedroom.*

JM:
-Kissing you hard and following you as you pull me by my belt. Breaking the kiss for a heartbeat to take off my shirt, picking you up by your ass, and turning you to press you against the closed door we just walked to. The bed is too far away. I need you, now. Grinding my hips into yours as your work at my belt, holding you against the wall while my hands make progress with your shirt. Ripping the material in half and throwing it to god only knows where in the room, then returning to kiss and suck at the column of your throat.-

Xhex:
*Fighting with your belt, I wish I could just rip the damn thing as easily as you tore my shirt. Finally getting it undone, I slide one hand down inside to stroke your length while I use the other to finish undoing your pants. Wrapping my legs around your waist, I kick off my boots, since there is no way I can get out of my own leathers like this.*

JM:
-Throwing my head back at your touch, fangs punching down in my mouth, hungry for all of you. Grinding against your hand, and cupping your tight breasts in my palms, trailing my mouth down your neck, to your collar bone, making my way down your body. I will taste every inch of you tonight. Every. Last. Inch. -

Xhex:
*Arching my back I push myself more firmly into your touch. Giving up on your leathers, I slide my legs down from around your waist to get my own off. Not easy given the way you have me pinned, but the damn things have to go.*

JM:
-Stripping myself of my own leathers, then wrapping your legs around my waist again, positioning myself at your core. Looking into your steel-gray eyes one last time before slamming home.-

Xhex:
*Crying out as you fill me, I bury my hands in your hair and stare into your face. Why the hell can’t I just say the words? Right here, right now. Nuzzling into your neck, it’s no easier to say than when I was looking in your eyes. Nipping at your earlobe, I give in to the moment, moving my hips in time with yours.*

JM:
-Pistoning in and out of you, with the ferocity of the bonded male that I now was, my lips peeling back from my teeth. Grazing my fangs against your neck, encouraging your movements, never once slowing mine.-

Xhex:
*I’ve been on edge all fucking night long, but this is so much better than letting my symphath sde run loose at #ZeroSum. The sharp dragging sensation of your fangs along my neck the final push I need. Throwing my head back, I scream out your name.*

JM:
-Fuck! My name leaving your lips was the best thing I’d ever heard. Feeling you clamp down on my cock as your release completely shatters you, I smirk as I feel my own release building. Increasing my pace until finally… finally… your name leaves my lips on a silent scream. Riding out my release while burying my face in your neck, trying to catch my breath.-

-Looking up at you, seeing a look of total bliss on your face, a shit-eating grin plastered to my face. Yeah, you are abso MINE. Kissing your lips, and taking you in my arms once again, I walk us both over to the bed in DM’s, to take you again, and again.-

Xhex’s Sticky Phone….

-Stretching my muscles and turning to look at the bedside clock, then throwing an arm over my eyes. Hell, I slept right through first meal, and I felt great! @XhexBDBFM’s blood coursing through my veins gave me more strength than I’ve had in a while. Well, after the feeding coma I went into, anyways. As soon as I got back to the compound, I came straight back to my room and crashed, like normal. This time, my dreams were not of some faceless female, but of @XhexBDBFM. I could still feel her on top of me, my fangs at her throat, her life’s blood pouring down my throat. Leaving her was hard. But of course, @XhexBDBFM insisted on having her independence. Reaching into the back pocket of my leathers, apparently I didn’t feel like striping when I got back, and grabbing the copper key that my female gave me, I bring it up to my chest and hold it there for a minute or two. This was my lifeline to her. A ray of hope that there might be a future for the two of us. Afterall, who says that they want their independence, then gives the male they have been trying relentlessly to push away the key to her hideout? She must feel something for me… right? -

-Thinking back to the events of last night, I feel myself get hard in my leathers. Again. Palming myself through the material, rocking my hips to try and find some relief. Fuck. I need to see my female again. Soon. Throwing the covers off of my body to get my ass in gear and into the shower, I’m stopped short when I hear something crash to the floor and slide around. Curious, I walk around and see @XhexBDBFM’s phone on the floor, the battery about three feet away from the body of the phone. And…. what else-? Sticky notes…. all of the sticky notes that I left for @XhexBDBFM at #ZeroSum. Smirking like a bastard, I pick up the pieces and reassemble her phone, sticking the sticky notes in the pocket of my leathers, with the copper key. Looks like I have to make a trip to #ZeroSum tonight afterall. Tossing the phone back on the bed, and doing the same with my leathers, I head off to the bathroom to get myself clean for my female.-

More than a fling…

JM:
*Pride swelled through my chest as @XhexBDBFM and I made our way back my room after first meal. We had been sharing a room for the past several nights, but tonight was the first time @XhexBDBFM joined me at first meal with all the others. She sat to my right, in a place of honor amongst vampires and their mates, and ate among myself and my family. I felt a bit of uneasiness from her throughout the entire meal, but she didn’t bolt from the room, which was a BFD when it came to my female. Maybe things were taking a turn in a good direction. Maybe she wanted to be with me. Maybe, she would even stay with me. As we reached the door to my room, I reached ahead and opened it, waiting for @XhexBDBFM to enter before me, but she didn’t cross the threshold. Turning to her, I cock a brow and sign to her* What’s doing?

Xhex:
*Shit. As if I needed any more proof of how fucking out of place I was, I actually let @JM_BDBFM talk me into joining him for First Meal in the dining room. With all the Brothers, and their shellans, and the young #Nalla. I swear one of the doggen was looking for a bowl of salt, and more than one of the females was sizing me up for a cocksucking gown and makeover. As for the Brothers, hard to tell how much of the posturing with knives was about carving my name into @JM_BDBFM’s back, and how much was about carving me up for fucking around with one of their own again. I know @KingWrath_BDBFM hasn’t forgotten what went down with #Murhder, but who knows how much the rest of them suspect. It is way past time to stop playing house Xhex. You are not that kind of female, and that’s not going to change after this many years. Pausing as @JM_BDBFM opens the door to our - HIS room, I know I can’t do this to him here.* Is there somewhere else we can go and talk? Somewhere nobody is likely to bother us.

JM:
*Narrowing my eyes I close the door, I indicate for you to follow me down past the hall of statues and up to another landing of the compound. Signing over my shoulder, I ask, “You got a problem with heights?” Relieved at your response, I open a window in the hallway and climb out into the night, up onto the highest landing on the compound’s roof. Turning, I reach my hand out to help you out, and move to sit in a position overlooking the gardens. The first time I went up here was after #Wellsie died, and I wanted to get away. Nobody thought to look for me here, and nobody would think to look for us here now. Watching @XhexBDBFM pace back and forth put me on edge. Whatever she wanted to say, wasn’t going to be something that I wanted to hear. Whistling to get her attention, I sign, “What’s doing? You’re on edge.”

Xhex:
*So distracted that I barely catch what you sign, I can’t stop the harsh laugh that escapes me. On edge is right, in so many ways. The edge of this roof, the edge of bolting the fuck out of here and the edge of a fall that is more paralyzing in some ways than if I were to pull a nosedive into the gardens right now. Pacing back and forth, I feel caged by how much I want to stay.* I should go home. I was staying here while I healed, but this isn’t where I belong. I’m healthy, so I should really get out of here. There’s no reason for me to stay. *Looking away from you quickly, I know the one reason to stay is the exact same reason I have to leave.*

JM:
*Bringing my knees up, and resting my forearms on them, I let my head hang on my shoulders. Of course you would want to bolt. Your end game is just you. No one else. No other ties. I was a fool for thinking anything could change that. But of course, if you wanted to leave, I wasn’t going to make you stay. At least not without saying my piece first. Whistling once, then again, and again until you actually looked at me again so I could sign* You are so wrong. This is where you belong, how can you not feel that? *Holding my hand up signalling that I wasn’t finished.* You may be physically healthy, but there’s still something going on with you, I can feel it. And there is every reason for you to stay. *Dropping my hand, and my head again, breaking eye contact briefly before continuing.* If you really want to go, then go. But I can’t promise that you’ll be able to come back. *Because if you left again, I don’t think I even could get you back. Dropping my hand again, I move to the edge of the roof, ready to make my way back inside the compound.*

Xhex:
*Frowning as I try to focus on your words, my ASL still a new skill, I realize I’ve fucked things up, but I’ll be damned if I can figure out how to fix this. Of course you would know there’s still more going on, but when have I ever been one for talking about feelings? Searching through everything I need to say, all the things  I should have already told you, I blurt out the first thing I think of when I see you get up to leave.* The PT suite. I had to get out of there because it was too much like the clinic where I was held by humans. My father’s family basically sold me. To humans. So they could experiment on the vampire. *Running my hands through my short hair, I growl as the familiar panic rises at the memory* That was why I woke up screaming. And why I couldn’t be alone. It all came back, waking up like that.

JM:
*I turned my head to look back at you, signing* Experiments? *Anger was rolling off me in waves as I stalked back over to you.* What do you mean experiments? *I caught your chin in my hand  before you had the chance to look away. No more running from shit. Whatever they did must have been critical… to get a scream like that out of a female a strong and solid as you? Fuck. But there was something else… something major that you weren’t telling me. That particular admission seems like it would have been even more of a reason to stay. Looking into your gun metal gray eyes, I see something else just barely surfacing through your emotions. Signing again.* What else aren’t you telling me, Xhex?

Xhex:
*Your bonding scent hits me as you stalk over, clearly furious over how was I mistreated even though you were barely alive when it happened. How a half-breed misfit could ever get that kind of reaction from a male of worth still stuns me. As for what else I’m not telling you, fuck it. I might as well rip off the damn bandaid and get it over with.* You ever hear the name #Murhder in your training?

JM:
*Thinking back to my training, both pre and post-trans, and not coming up with anything. But for some reason, that name does sound familiar. Maybe he was brought up in conversation at some point in the mansion. But wait, not only does the name sound familiar… but I know that he left the brotherhood after going to the Symphath Colony. Something about him not being right in the head. The thoughts and information are jumbled and not making sense. An all-too-familiar feeling starts to consume my body, and I take a deep breath and control myself before another seizure starts, then look up to you and nod my head, signing* I’ve heard the name. He was a brother at one point. Wasn’t he?

Xhex:
*Sitting down, I gesture to the space beside me as I get my thoughts in order. For some reason that secondary shadow grid I’ve picked up from you just became more prominent, and I still haven’t figured out what it means. Hard as I tried to push you away, I can’t deny you’ve bonded with me, and that means my next words are bound to piss you off.* Yeah, he was a Brother. I mentioned him that night @KingWrath_BDBFM came to get you from #ZeroSum. I told Wrath I didn’t want things to turn into #Murhder all over again. *Pulling my knees in close to my chest and wrapping my arms around them, I can still remember his face, the relief when he found me quickly replaced by shock, horror and disgust.* Not too sure how many details any of the Brothers know about it, but #Murhder went to the Colony to get me out of there after my father’s family claimed me. I never told him what I was. Maybe it was all the sin eaters messing with his mind, or maybe it was just finding out the truth about the female he thought he was saving, but his mind snapped. He’d still be in the Brotherhood if it wasn’t for me.

JM:
*Putting the pieces together in my head…signing* You and he were… *Your nod of confirmation was like a knife through the chest. I sat down beside you, not sure that my legs could hold myself up anymore. I did not like the thought of you with another male, even if that male was a respectable Brother. But what was I going to do? Not like I haven’t been with countless whores in the not-so-distant past. Shaking the thoughts from my head, not wanting to go down that road, I choose my next round of signs carefully.* I’m not #Murhder. And I already know what you are. I still came after you, and I’m fine. *Meeting your eyes, I continue.* You’re not going to scare me away. *Knowing you weren’t going to buy the whole ‘It wasn’t your fault” thing, I decided to avoid that for the time being. Besides, I wanted you thinking about me. Not #Murhder.*

Xhex:
*Shaking my head slowly, I can’t help but smile.* No, I already put a hell of an effort into it, and didn’t scare you away. I know you’re not #Murhder, and that’s part of the problem. Yes, I feel bad about what happened to him, but he was… *groping through my mind for a way to describe things, and hating the one I find* He was a fling. Never more than a way to pass some time for me really. *Cringing at how callous the description sounds, but trying to make you see why things are different with you.* I wouldn’t have asked anyone else to stay when I woke up. I only got that scream under control when @DocJane_BDBFM mentioned your name. As soon as I could have hauled my ass out of that bed, I would have gone straight back to my own space, to take care of myself, no matter what the good doctor had to say about recovery. That is why I have to get out of here. Not that I don’t want you around, but there was a lot of expectation on those faces around the table just now. And I’m not that female.

JM:
*Wondering exactly how this situation makes me different from #Murhder, a mixture of rage, jealousy and pure bonded male courses through my veins. My fangs punch down in my mouth out of anger, and needing to feed didn’t exactly help. I sign before I can stop myself.* With all this talk of you leaving, it sure makes me feel like a fling. I helped you pass the time until you were ready to bolt again. How exactly are things “different”? *I get up and start to walk back to the window. Just before I climb through it, I turn and sign again.* I’m not asking you to be my god damn shellan. I was just hoping that you could know that I would have, if you’d fucking let me. But, message received. Bolt if you want. I’m done.

Xhex:
*As soon as I see the word “shellan” all I can picture in my mind is your back with my name carved there for the world to see. Fuck. That should not affect me so much. I’m not one of those flowers and perfume females, but the idea of you wearing my name in your skin is such a fucking turn on that I almost miss the rest of what you say. Standing up to follow right on your heels, I can’t believe that you’d come to your senses NOW* What? That’s it? I say I don’t want to stay here all the time, and you’re just going to fucking walk? I insulted you, I’ve pushed you away, I ratted you out to the Brotherhood, and now that I won’t play house, you’re done? *Yanking a copper key out of my back pocket, I shove it in your face.* Even @Rehvenge_BDBFM doesn’t know about this place of mine. Yes, I want to be back in my own space, but I wasn’t saying I didn’t want you there too!

JM:
*Spinning around on my heel, I get in your face and sign* And now that I’m finally walking, you decide you don’t want me to any more? *Looking at the key that you’ve flashed in my face, as a sort of peace offering, and thinking you need to make up your damn mind.* You want me with you? *Eyeing the vein pumping in your neck, my fangs throbbing with the need for blood, I straighten my spine, and sign* Prove it.

Xhex:
*Seeing your gaze shift to my neck, it suddenly hits me that you’ve fed me quite a lot lately, and with your refusal to leave me alone, you probably haven’t fed. Knowing there’s probably a whole line of Chosen for you to pick from, I can’t deny their blood is probably stronger, but fuck that! No way in hell I want some perfect little female draping herself all over you so you can feed.* I never wanted you to leave. Not for me, I’m too selfish. I kept hoping you’d find someone better. *Holding up my hand to stop the same old argument.* I know what you say about that, but as a half-breed, my blood isn’t that strong. I wanted you to find someone who would be a better match, better blood, better standing. *Inhaling deeply, all I can smell is your bonding scent with you so close.* But there’s no chance of that now, is there? I know you need to feed, but not up here. I’ll demat to the door that key opens. Everyone will just think you’re hiding somewhere in the mansion with me, so @Qhuinn_BDBFM shouldn’t get in trouble. *Kissing you hard, I demat to my basement crash pad.*

JM:
*A low vibration that would have been a growl for any other male rumbled through my chest. Selfish? Better blood? Better standing? What the fuck was she talking about? Better match? When will @XhexBDBFM learn that she is my best match? Shocked by her kiss, I hesitated before following her to whatever door that key unlocked.*

Xhex:
*Waiting at the door, my inner paranoid bitch is cursing up a storm that I’m letting anyone know about this place at all, let alone @JM_BDBFM. Hard enough to know #Fritz loaded my Ducati up to move it from #ZeroSum. Harder still that the old doggen was in my place on the Hudson while I was out of it so he could pick up a few of my things. This is my last bolt hole; the one secure place where I can disappear when I need to. Fiddling with the zipper on the hoodie, I remember @JM_BDBFM’s face when I put it on after grabbing it from the chair he had just thrown it. Such a fucking chick move, but it looked more comfortable than the scrubs I’d been wearing. Nothing at all to do with it being warm and smelling like @JM_BDBFM, and the way he’d tried to hide that shit eating grin had been priceless. Damn it, Xhex. You better not have fucked this up.

JM:
*Rematerializing in front of what looked like an everyday apartment building, I see you leaning against the brownstone of the building, playing with the zipper of my hoodie. Fuck you looked good in my clothes. My fangs throbbing double-time as I approached you, I’m stunned that you are opening up so much to me. You’re not the type to show anyone all of your secrets, and I can’t believe that not even @Rehvenge_BDBFM knew about this place. Hoping that this is a sign of better things to come, I nod to the doorway, and sign to you* This it?

Xhex:
*Pushing off from the wall of the brownstone as I see you materialize, I gesture to the alcove under the stairs.* Right in here. It’s not much, just a basic place to crash, but nobody, and I mean nobody, else knows about this place. This is where I come when I’m serious about not being found. *Looking you in the eyes, I hope you can tell how significant it is for me to trust you with this.* This is where I go when I bolt.

JM:
*Yeah, this is definitely not like you…. why are you showing me your only get-away? Closing the distance between the two of us, I grip your waist in one hand, and pull you to me to crush my lips against yours in a kiss just as hard as the one you gave me before you dematted here. Releasing your lips, and leaning my forehead down to yours, I mouth a “Thank you” before urging you towards the door. Not only were my fangs throbbing, but my cock decided to join the party too.*

Xhex:
*Convincing myself the alcove is not, in fact, private enough for anything either one of us has in mind, I quickly twist the key in the lock. The lights come on as soon as I push the door open, but I don’t even notice the hallway as I head straight for the second door to unlock it. This place is a far cry from the mansion, but it’s secure and functional. Turning back to you, I shrug.* It’s not a lot. Like I said, it’s a bolt hole, but it’s always been enough in a pinch. And you’re free to come here anytime you need a break, some time away from prying eyes. *Biting the inside of my cheek as I realize what a repetitive idiot I’m turning into, I wait awkwardly for some response. Like this is the first time I’ve ever brought a male to my place. Which it is.*

JM:
*Taking in the room, it oddly reminds me of my apartment before @Tohr_BDBFM brought me to the mansion. Nothing but the essentials. A bed takes up most of the room, and a bathroom is off in the back. No windows, no rugs. Just 3 vents to let in fresh air, and the wood of the floor. I was half-expecting to see a pad filled with weapons, french stockings and stillies. But, the room fits you. It’s functional, nothing more. I turn to you to offer my gratitude, and sign* Thank you, Xhex. *I wish I had more to say, but my brain wasn’t functioning correctly. From beside you, I eyed the vein in your neck, as your jaw worked at biting your cheek.*

Xhex:
*Rolling my shoulders against the sudden tension, I know you need to feed, and that you’ve probably been waiting until I was fully healed. I don’t even know if you would have asked to feed from me. Old habits tell me this is dangerous, but looking into your blue eyes, I know you’ve seen the worst of me, so there is no secret that I’m going to expose. Taking your hand, I guide you to the bed, and gently push you down to a sitting position. Stepping between your thighs, I tilt my head to the side.* Take from me.

JM:
*Looking up at you as you step between my legs, I see the determination on your face. Reaching my hand up to cup your cheek, I draw you down to me, and graze my fangs along the column of your neck, before sinking my fangs deep into your vein. The rush of your blood hits me like a mack truck, and I pull you down on top of me and I lay back on the bed, never once breaking my seal on your vein.*

Xhex:
*Hissing in pleasure at the sting of your bite, I curse inwardly at my lack of foresight. We are both still wearing way too many clothes as you pull me down on top of you. But if this is about me proving you’re not just a fling, then showing you my safe house is only a start. No demands, no running. This time, I’m letting you set as the pace as we head to DMs*

A Not-so-Happy Mother’s Day

*@XhexBDBFM was resting peacefully when I left the PT suite to stretch my legs. Just a quick walk around the lower level, then right back to lying down next to her as she slept.

I took out my phone to check the date, and saw a notification in my calendar. Mother’s Day. My heart sank with the realization. Granted, it wasn’t a typical holiday that I celebrated growing up, since I had no mother to speak of, but that all changed with Wellsie….

Fuck. Just the thought of her still brought tears to my eyes. She would have been a great Mahmen. And she would have been a proud Mahmen. Just as @Tohr_BDBFM would have been a proud Papa.

As I rounded the corner, I thought back to my favorite memory of Wellsie -the night Tohr brought me to live with them. She had prepared what was sure to have been an amazing meal for herself and her hellren. And somehow, she knew exactly what I would need to nourish my pathetic pretrans body -white rice and ginger sauce. It was the first real meal I had eaten in months, and I would forever be grateful for that kindness. And when I was overwhelmed with my emotions, she sent Tohr off and let me have a moment to collect myself without injuring what little pride I had left. For what little time I knew her, I considered Wellsie my mother. And I will always consider her my mother, whether she thought of me as a son, or not. Wellsie was the very definition of a female of worth, and she absolutely would have made a great mother to her young.

My thoughts then drifted to @Tohr_BDBFM, as they often do when I remember Wellsie. I hadn’t really seen him since @XhexBDBFM had woken up, and given the holiday, I should probably at least check in with him. He must be hurting now too. Yes, Mother’s day is typically a human holiday, but no doubt Wellsie had told him all about the holiday in her excitement about her pregnancy. Plus, with @Bella_BDBFM and Nalla in the compound, the others must be buzzing about the holiday as well.  As I made my way back to @XhexBDBFM’s room, I started writing a text to him. Unsure of what else to say, I fired off an “I’m here if you need me” text to @Tohr_BDBFM, then sent a “Happy Mahmen’s Day” to @Bella_BDBFM, and headed back to watch over my female while she rested.*

Sharing

Xhex:
*Running through the ASL letters you’ve been teaching me, I know I still have a lot to learn before I don’t have to ask you to clarify by writing on a sticky note or a text on your phone. Putting those two images together triggers something, and I look up sharply as gaps in my memory start filling in.* Where’s my phone? I remember I called the Brotherhood number…

JM:
*You’re picking up ASL rather quickly, and I can’t help but be proud of you. I remember when I was first learning. I was so  confused, and had to repeat things over and over to get them memorized. Must be a vampire learning curve. Stopping at your sharp look, and hearing a nuance of panic in your voice when you question the whereabouts of your phone, I reach into my pocket and retrieve it for you. Signing slowly so you can understand.* I kept it safe.

Xhex:
*Taking my phone from your hand, I slide the battery cover off and back on quickly once I’m sure your notes are still safely inside. Deciding not to ask why you kept it with you instead of just locking it in a drawer, I look down as I turn the power back on.* Thanks, @JM_BDBFM. You didn’t have to… *As the screen flashes to life, I suddenly remember why I had called the Brotherhood.* Did you get him? @Lash_BDBFM or the civilian he took? Did you get either of them?

JM:
*Wondering why you checked the battery so quickly before turning the phone back on, but my concerns are wiped away with your next batch of questions. I shake my head, and again, sign slowly.* No. @Lash_BDBFM is proving hard to find. and I don’t even know if @Lucinda_BDBFM is still alive. *I can only imagine what @Blay_BDBFM is feeling. Now this bastard had 2 strikes. Kidnapping @Lucinda_BDBFM and nearly killing my female. It’s time to strike him out.*

Xhex:
*Growling at the thought of @Lash_BDBFM still loose and@Lucinda_BDBFM still in his hands, I resist the urge to throw my phone across the room.* Bastard! He didn’t go through the effort of capturing a male for nothing. It could be that he thought the male had some information, but I really think he needed someone for @Lucinda_BDBFM to feed from. I can’t fucking believe I let that little shit get the drop on me. As soon as I get out of here… *A wave of guilt hits me as I remember my promise  to you that I would be careful. Meeting your eyes, all I can see is your face the night I got taken down.*

JM:
*Fuck, we just got you out of a coma, and you already want to go out and get @Lash_BDBFM. I can’t say I’m surprised, but fuck if my heart didn’t want to race out of my damn chest and stop you. Taking a deep breath, I sign to you.* You won’t be going anytime soon. I already told you to be careful once. I let you go yourself, because you promised to be careful, yet you still almost got yourself killed. *Lowering my gaze, not able to meet your eyes. Still signing* I can’t go through that again. If you go. You go with backup. *Finally meeting your gaze, my emotions clear as day in my eyes, I sign,* Please.

Xhex:
*Concentrating on what you’re signing helps keep my temper in check at the idea that you somehow allowed me to do anything.  Mostly because I know you’re right. I should have called for backup as soon as I saw @Lash_BDBFM, but I wanted a shot at him on my own.* Look @JM_BDBFM, I owe that little prick some serious pay back. It was pure chance that I spotted him that night. I wasn’t even out looking for him. But you’re right, I can’t take him alone. *Sensing everything you’ve gone through these past days,  I want to scream, knowing that I was the cause of it. Terrified of having someone care so much what happens to me.*

JM:
*I nod my head, knowing that I can’t completely stop you from going after @Lash_BDBFM, but the small victory of you admitting that you shouldn’t take him out alone was enough to calm my immediate fears. Signing,* If you need to go after him. Text me . @Qhuinn_BDBFM and I will go with you. *I would be there whether you said yes or not. There’s no way I’m letting you take him out without me there. I’d find a way. Even if you say no.*

Xhex: *Letting my head fall back against the headboard, I groan as I think about how much trouble I could be getting you in if you dragged yourself and @Qhuinn_BDBFM out to help me.* Like you said, I’m still not going far any time soon. I would love to get out of this room, but I don’t think @DocJane_BDBFM is ready to let me go home yet.

JM:
*Taking your groan to mean that you are in pain, I jump up from my chair to see what you might need. When you seem fine, I ease back down in my chair, and sign to you again.* No, @DocJane_BDBFM definitely won’t let you go home yet. But- *thinking back to my conversation with @KingWrath_BDBFMand @QueenBeth_BDBFM* You are welcome to stay here, at the mansion.* Stopping you before you interrupt me.* You wouldn’t have to stay with me specifically. There are plenty of rooms. You could have your own if you wanted. *The “right next door to mine” went unsigned as I looked at you holding my breath, waiting for a response.*

Xhex:
*Somewhere around the time you sign that I wouldn’t need to stay with you specifically, I stop paying attention to what else you’re signing as my libido takes over. My body heating at the thought of ebing able to stay with you all day, it takes me  a few seconds to realize you’re waiting for me to respond. Trying to cover and stall all at once. * I missed some of that @JM_BDBFM, but *my voice dropping as I think of all the reasons this is a bad idea* if you don’t mind sharing, I’d rather not be alone @JM_BDBFM.

JM:
*My eyes widen slightly at your body’s response. I could smell a slight arousal coming off of you, and didn’t that make me feel  like the alpha bonded male. Your words shake me bit. I was prepared for you to fight me, not agree with me. Signing* I definitely don’t mind sharing, if that’s what you want. *Wanting to take you up to my room right now, but not knowing if that is the best idea at the moment. I didn’t want to move you unnecessarily. Shifting in my seat, trying to conceal the hard on I had behind the zipper of my leathers due to your arousal, I sign to you.* How are you feeling? Better?

Xhex:
*Knowing I should back away right now, tell you I’m fine staying here, or that I need my own space, all I can think about is just taking a few days to relax. Let my body finish healing. Right. Relaxing is way down on the list of what I want to do and the hint of your bonding scent tells me again why I shouldn’t be doing this. I’m not a typical female, and sooner or later this going to blow up in my face. Fuck it. I’ll deal with consequences. I always do.* Yeah, I’m feeling better. Are you sure it’s okay that I stay at the mansion? With you?

JM:
*Nodding as I sign to you* Yes, of course it’s okay to stay at the mansion. *Smiling* With me. *My body humming with the knowledge that you are staying, I stamp down my need to take you, and close the DM door, to continue your ASL lessons* #BDBFM

Feeding Time Part Two

Xhex:
*Still half asleep, the first thing I notice as I wake is the absence of one large, warm, male warrior on the bed beside me. Opening my eyes, I see @JM_BDBFM at the door, with a large picnic style basket. Sitting up, I remember @DocJane_BDBFM’s words of caution  but as the strength from your blood spreads through me, the thought of food is more tempting than the thought of you. Groaning as the scent of the food reaches me, I prop myself up on the bed.* Something in there smells amazing @JM_BDBFM.


JM:
*Taking the basket from #Fritz, I close the door and turn back to you, and find you awake. The feeding had knocked you out for a good half hour. A half hour that allowed me to watch over you, stroke your short black hair, and hold you to me.  It was the most peaceful half hour I’ve had since @Lash_BDBFM attacked you. I owed @DocJane_BDBFM, @EhlenaBDBFM_ and  @Vishous_BDBFM my life for taking care of you and bringing you back to me. Your words snap me out of my trance, and I notice that even your voice is stronger than it was before. My blood did that for you. My blood was now coursing through your body and healing you from the inside, out. The bonded male in me roared, and my bonding scent filled the air. Somehow, I don’t  think that it’s just the food you are smelling. Nodding in response to your statement, I bring the basket over to you and use the nightstand to make you a plate. Roasted chicken, rice, and some salad with a light dressing. Perfect. Hopefully, this wouldn’t upset your stomach.*


Xhex:
*Dropping my eyes as your bonding scent fills the room, I remind myself that I need food if I want to get out of here anytime soon. And I really shouldn’t be so turned on by such an obvious sign of male protectiveness. But coming from you? I could almost get used to the idea of being protected once in a while. Watching you prepare a plate of food for me, I wonder if you even notice the way you pick through the food before putting any on the plate.* Thanks @JM_BDBFM. @DocJane_BDBFM warned me to take it easy with food. How long was I out for?

JM:
*Bringing the plate with me as I sit myself back on the bed with you, I mouth the words “Only a half hour”, and begin to cut  the chicken breast into bite-sized pieces. When I’m done, I spear a piece onto the fork, and start to bring it to your mouth. Catching myself, I pause halfway and offer you the plate, and the fork. You are the most independent female I know, and you would want to keep your independence as much as possible throughout your healing.*

Xhex:
*Frowning as I watch you cut the chicken, I realize my question was unclear. Seeing you pause and offer me the fork, I know it had to have been a deliberate move on your part, after preparing the meal so carefully like any bonded male would do for his female. Taking the fork and plate, I wonder if it would really be so bad to let myself be fed. Shoving that thought  aside, I clarify my question before I start to eat.* I didn’t mean just now. I’m sure @DocJane_BDBFM must have said how long I’d been unconscious in her care. I was a little busy screaming like an idiot to pay attention though.


JM:
*Pulling out my phone, I type in my answer to your question.* 3 days. You’ve been out for 3 days. And don’t ever call yourself an idiot. *I flash my phone to you, and allow you time to read it in between bites of food.*


Xhex:
*Nodding slowly as I read, I realize I must have been in pretty bad shape to be out for that long, given how recently I had fed from you. Knowing you probably won’t want to talk about how bad my injuries were, I leave the subject alone.* Well, I felt like an idiot. I’m not a screamer, John. *Feeling my face heat as the full meaning of what I said hits me, I look down at my plate to hide the blush. Fuck, could I get any more girly?*


JM:
*Typing out on my phone* You had every right to scream. You woke up in a strange place, with no knowledge of what was going on. *I flash you the screen and allow you a few moments to read. Just as you are about to comment, I hold up a finger, signaling that I had more to say. Bringing up a blank text message* Do NOT be embarrassed. Nobody thinks any less of you because of it. *I flash the phone to you again. I know your pride is hurting more than any injury that you sustained. Weakness was not something that you ever showed anybody.*

Xhex:
*Growling as I wait for your second text, I remember the ASL classes I never took.* You really need to teach me sign language, And it wasn’t just about waking up somewhere strange. It was about waking up somewhere so … clinical. I don’t do hospitals @JM_BDBFM.


JM:
*Cocking a brow, I respond to your first statement with my phone.* I would love nothing more than to teach you sign language. Why don’t you do hospitals? What happened? *Knowing that something bad must have happened if you weren’t comfortable around anything clinical. The bonded male in me needed to know the source of your discomfort.*

Xhex:
*Thinking quickly, I decide to go with a short answer rather than let myself get sucked back into my past as a lab rat.* I had a really bad stay in a medical facility about twenty-five years ago. *Groaning as I realize that was almost as long ago as you were born, I change back to a safer subject than my cougar status.* So, when can I start learning ASL @JM_BDBFM?

JM:
*Frowning when you don’t go into any further detail about the hospital sitch, but I don’t want to pressure you. Hearing your next question plasters a smirk on my face, as I sign.* How about right now? *I shut the DM door to begin our lessons.* #BDBFM

Feeding Time Part One

Xhex:
*Watching you enter the room, I find a level of calm I haven’t had since I woke up. I still want the fuck out of this room, but I don’t have to force myself to ignore the room around me. keeping my eyes locked on yours, I let myself fall back against the bed and pillows, annoyed by how weak and shaky I feel. Reading your phone, I clear my throat as I try to figure out the best way to answer you.* I’d say fine, but I don’t think you’d believe me @JM_BDBFM. I’m getting better, how’s that?

JM:
*Nodding to you, I delete the message on my phone and type another. “DJ says you need to feed. Will you take my vein?” Hesitating before showing you the screen, wanting to just slice at my wrist and bring it to your lips, but knowing better than to force you. I hold my phone in front of you, allowing you to read my message. Letting you choose whether you will take from me or not.*


Xhex:
*chuckles as I read your message* The good doctor has a lot to say. Including that there’s another room? *Looking down quickly to hide the flare of panic as I think of the equipment @DocJane_BDBFM took out of this room, I hope the other one looks less
like a lab.* I do need to feed @JM_BDBFM, but I’d really like to get the hell out of this room first, if we can.

JM:
*Catching a flash of panic across your face before you can hide it, I can’t help but wonder if I was the cause. Looking at the door to the next room quickly before turning back to my phone. @DocJane_BDBFM said to use that room as a last resort to see to your comfort, but fuck it. “I will take you there, if you will let me. I don’t think you should be walking yet.” Praying that you would let me hold you, I flash the screen to you. I desperately needed to feel you in my arms.*

Xhex:
*Nodding as I read the screen, I bite back any comments about being able to get myself from point A to B on my own, since I clearly am not at my best. I also shove down some strange alien urge to swoon, or giggle, or…. something fucked up and girly at the thought of you carrying me off like the end of some romance movie.* That’s probably the best plan. I don’t really need to face plant on top of that screaming bullshit I was pulling earlier. *Reaching up, I link my hands behind your neck so you know I’m okay with you carrying me out of this room.

JM:
*I quickly slide my phone back into my pocket and draw back the sheet so I can hook one arm under your knees, and the other around your back. Taking your slight weight in my arms and cradling you against my chest on our way to the other room, I’ll be damned if my body wasn’t purring with pride at the fact that you were allowing me to care for you. Turning, I gently push the door open with my shit kicker and bring you into the adjoining room. This room was completely different from where we were just seconds before, and I could only hope that this would help with your healing. Carefully, I walk you over to the bed, and  lay you down on top of the covers. The hospital scrubs you were in were a sharp contrast to your usual leathers and muscle tank, but fuck if you didn’t look just as tempting, laying there with complete trust in your eyes. Trust in me.*

Xhex:
*Taking advantage of the way my body shifts towards you as you pick me up with ease, I bury my face in your chest, your clean scent clearing away the stinging antiseptic smell that lingers in any hosptal setting. The warmth of your body soothing away a chill I hadn’t even realized was there. Shaking as you carry me into the other room, I know I’m going to lose it again if this new room has that same white tile feel. Unless @Rehvenge_BDBFM has been talking, there’s no way you can know why being anywhere else is so important to me. Opening my eyes as you set me on another bed, I finally take a truly deep breath, even knowing logically that I haven’t gone that far.* Thank you, @JM_BDBFM. I’m not really good with medical shit. This is much better. Thanks.

JM:
*I nod to you as I ease down to sit beside you on the bed. I cock my brows and offer you my wrist, silently asking if you’re ready to feed.*

Xhex:
*Feeling my fangs throb as they elongate, I reach for your hand. Lacing my fingers through yours, I study the differences between our hands as an excuse to avoid looking you in the eye.* Could you lay down with me? I’m still feeling a little cold… * Letting my voice trail off, all I want to do is pull you down beside me, but part of me remembers everything I did to push you away. The fact that you’re offering your vein at all gives me hope I didn’t destroy whatever this is between us. *

JM:
*Surprised at your request, but wanting to give you anything you need, I nod and bend down to unlace and remove my shit kickers before climbing onto the bed. When you turn into my body, my arms instantly wrap around you and cradle you close. Almost immediately, a wave of guilt washes over me as I remember just how many of those whores I fucked at #ZeroSum to get back at you for pushing me away. Not feeling worthy of being so close to you, I loosen my hold on your body, and feel the pride  I had felt only moments before begin to fade. Hesitantly, I began to offer you my wrist again, knowing that you need to feed.*

Xhex:
*Frowning as I sense a change in your mood, I look down as you offer me your wrist again. Pulling myself up your body, getting closer, I look you in the eyes* Don’t. Whatever it is John, don’t go there. *Resisting the temptation to find out what changed your mood, I keep my eyes locked on yours as long as I can while I lower my mouth to your neck, dragging my fangs along your vein before I strike.*

JM:
*My eyes roll back in my head as you strike at my neck, and all guilt is forgotten. Fisting the hair at the nape of your neck,  I cradle you close to me once more, and close the DM door to allow you privacy to feed.* #BDBFM

Needing my female…

Xhex:
*Keeping my jaw clenched and my eyes locked on @DocJane_BDBFM, I feel my breath, sharp and ragged, as I try to focus on your questions. Swallowing repeatedly against the raw burn from my earlier screams, I try to answer quickly with my jaw still clenched.* Not queasy.  Need to get out. *Already feeling the panic taking hold again, I try to make you understand* Please @DocJane_BDBFM. Let. Me. Out.

DJ:
*Eyeing you as you speak, my voice dead serious* You need to stay here, Xhex, until your body is totally healed. Now, what you need is behind that door *points at the door* @JM_BDBFM is out there, waiting for you to wake up. So here is the deal, you will stay here, until you get fed and better. Also food would be a good idea, but take it easy, it may upset your stomach. There is a full bathroom, with towels, and scrubs. When ready, feel free to use all you need. I will let @JM_BDBFM in now. I will check on you later. If you feel queasy, in pain or anything, don’t hesitate to tell @JM_BDBFM he will know how to get me. This is important. I don’t care how strong or independent you are. I mean it. Let @JM_BDBFM know. Are we clear?

Xhex:
*Hearing the strangled whimpering sob that breaks free when you tell me I can’t leave I can almost laugh when you call me strong and independent. If I fucking chick out anymore I’ll have to start clucking.* I’ll try @DocJane_BDBFM. But I’m not loving the medical decor. *Pausing for my throat, I try again.* Please @DocJane_BDBFM, is there anywhere else @JM_BDBFM can keep an eye on me?

DJ:
*smiling, I squeeze your hand, knowing, despite of your strength, you will appreciate the contact* I tell you what, I am going to take out these two machines and the IV pole. Then @JM_BDBFM will come in, and if you still feel you need to get out of here he can carry you to the contiguous room, alright? It is only until you feed and feel better, deal?

Xhex:
*Squeezing your hand briefly in return, I know this is the best I’m going to get right now.* Thanks, @DocJane_BDBFM. It’s a deal.

DJ:
*nods* alright then, I am going to remove the IV line. I am pretty good at it, but still, you may feel a lightly sting, here we go ..*removes the IV needle smoothly and applies a band aid on place, just in case* Done! now, let me get these machines and the IV pole inside my office and I will ask @JM_BDBFM to come in. I shall see you later. *nods as I push the machines and the IV pole inside the office I have next to the PT Suite, closing the door and looking back at you once more* Remember, feed, eat and rest. That’s all you really need. *smiles as I leave the room, finding my hellren @Vishous_BDBFM and @JM_BDBFM outside*

JM:
*The instant the door opens, my head snaps up, and I’m on my feet. Frantically signing to @DocJane_BDBFM.* What happened? Why was she Screaming? Is she okay? *Panic and pure protective instincts for my female kicking in, needing to see her. Needing to hear that she is okay. Signing* Tell me. Is my @XhexBDBFM all right?

DJ:
*Expecting your anxiety, I place my hand on your forearm* She is fine, John. She screaming? that’s a normal response after what she has been through. Now, she needs to feed and to eat. Easy thought, her stomach may get upset. She is scared, dead scared of being inside that room, but my guess is, what she really needs is you. Take it easy. I promised her, that if after you got in with her, she still wants to go to another room, you both could use the contiguous room, although I have a feeling that won’t be necessary. Regardless, you know you have that option. Also, inside the bathroom, you will find towels and scrubs should you need them. Again, she is fine, but if she feels queasy, or in pain or if you sense something is wrong John, you must call me immediately. Are we clear, John? *looks at @Vishous_BDBFM and back at you*

JM:
*I nod to you as @Vishous_BDBFM finally lets me go. I turn to V and sign* Can you have #Fritz send down some food?  Something easy for her to digest… Some rice, and chicken maybe? Salad?

Vishous:
*relieved to see my shellan @DocJane_BDBFM finally step through the door, watching and listening intently as I let John go* I gotcha covered, true? *is glad that I can help put John at ease..remembering the hell I went through when @DocJane_BDBFM was shot, and I give @DocJane_BDBFM a look, letting her know I’ll meet her back in the Pit for some R & R as I head off down the hall*

JM:
*Nodding to @Vishous_BDBFM before I turn to @DocJane_BDBFM, I sign* Thank you, for all that you’ve done. I hate to think what might have happened to @XhexBDBFM if we didn’t have you around. *Placing a fist over my heart, I tip slightly at the waist in a show of deepest respect -wondering where the urge to do so came from. I straighten and walk through the double doors almost shaking with need to see my female.*

DJ:
*nodding as you bow* You are my family, John. I would do anything for my family *smiling, knowing what I just have said, I head off toward the Pit, to give you and @XhexBDBFM the privacy and space you both need right now*

Xhex:
*Watching @DocJane_BDBFM leave, keeping my eyes fixed on the door, straining for any sound, especially one that will mean coming in, I fight to keep my panic in check. As the seconds tick by, I know I might have to break my deal with @DocJane_BDBFM, and have @JM_BDBFM get me out of this room first, before I lose it again. Fuck, how long does it take to tell a male he can see his female? Shit. Trying to sit up and pretend I have some dignity still, I finally see the door open as @JM_BDBFM enters.* …………….TBC………..

Fighting for my female…

JM:
*I take form just in front of the PT suite doors… my heart racing, wondering what the fuck is happening to my female. Every cell in my body was screaming for @XhexBDBFM, and I would rip through anyone who stood in my way. Why the fuck were they waking her up without me there? Don’t they know that she’s my- That she’s my female? I ran up to the doors and almost ran right past @Vishous_BDBFM, but he grabbed me tight by the arm, preventing any more progress toward my female.*

Vishous:
*sees John take form in the hallway, I stand up, and put out my handrolled on the heel of my shitkicker, because I know what is going to happen in..1…yeah..less than a second as John tries to rush the door, and I grab his arm* Not yet…just cool out here for a second, ok? Wait until my @DocJane_BDBFM calls for you. It is what’s best, true? I know it’s tough…how are you?

JM:
*glaring at V, and signing* How am I doing? My female is in there on that table, with no fucking clue where she is or who she’s with. How do you think I am? *Wishing like hell I knew what was going on behind the doors to the PT Suite.*

Doc Jane:
*checking @XhexBDBFM ‘s vitals once more, she is now breathing on her own, amazed of how fast vampires can wake up after an induced coma I take the syringe with the painkiller cocktail and inject it in the IV bag, she is going to need it. I open the roller clamp so the painkiller will get quickly in her system. Looking down at her as she starts to move, and getting ready for the bad mood follow by the panic that normally occurs in these situation. I grab her hand and her chin with my other hand while I talk* Xhex you are safe, at the Compound, everything is fine now. Can you hear me? can you squeeze my hand? Don’t worry, it is normal to feel the way you are feeling, trust me. Nothing is wrong with you, just weaned you off the induced coma. *smiles as I wait for you to come around*

Xhex:
*A persistent beeping filters through my brain, cutting through everything and blending in at the same time. Medical monitors. Fucking hell. I can feel the pinch of the IV, everything still fuzzy, but far too clear to be a nightmare. Swallowing repeatedly, I try to choke back the scream I can feel trying to break free. A voice is calling my name, telling me I’m safe, asking for trust. Opening my eyes, the first thing I spot is a lab coat. IV pole next. Glass  front cabinets filled with medical supplies. The calming voice is drowned out as I scream, fight, anything to get out!*

JM:
*Hearing @XhexBDBFM’s scream sets off every protective instinct in my body. I instantly struggle against @Vishous_BDBFM’s hold on me. but true to him being a brother, he doesn’t let up easily. In fact, he grabs both of my arms even tighter, and I nearly pull them out of their sockets in my efforts to get to my female. Frustrated, I let out my own silent scream, unable to do anything else. My female….My @XhexBDBFM…. was terrified… or hurt… and I couldn’t help her. I silently plead with @Vishous_BDBFM to let me go. Let me go to her….. but all to no avail. @Vishous_BDBFM is not letting me go anytime soon.*

Vishous:
*sets my jaw as I hear @XhexBDBFM’s screams, I try to hold John’s gaze to keep him focused, but he is all bonded male, and I am surprised at how much strength it is taking to keep him from making scrap out of the door* She’s ok…just focus…she needs you but not like this…breathe, man…whatever is going on in there, @DocJane_BDBFM is with her..and you’ve got a strong female…

Doc Jane:
*as you scream, I hold you down, knowing with the amount of drugs you’ve got in your system, there’s no way you can wake up  I lock my eyes on yours while I squeeze your hand, calling out your name* Xhex, deep breaths, everything is fine now. You are safe. Look around, focus, I am Doc Jane, see? come on, deep breaths, you just woke up from an induced coma, your body was healing while you were asleep. Come on, try to relax now or you may hurt yourself, or worse, I will have to put you to sleep, again. We don’t want that, do we? I am sure@JM_BDBFM must be down here already, outside the PT Suite as we speak, or rather as I speak, yes? *eyeing you, trying to reassure you the situation*

Xhex:
*”Look around” the voice says. Bad fucking plan for someone who wants me calm. All I need is some freak with camera, and I might as well be playing lab rat to humans again. Feeling like any sane and rational part of me is watching from  across the room, I can’t even try to stop screaming, but the mention of @JM_BDBFM’s name snaps my head around to focus on@DocJane_BDBFM*

Doc Jane:
*smiles at you because I knew I would get your attention once I mentioned @JM_BDBFM ‘s name* Welcome back, Xhex. Can you talk? *It may hurt a bit, to talk, because of the mechanical ventilator tube, but your throat should be fine within an hour or so. now, deep breaths, and tell me, are you feeling queasy, in pain? I need to know how do you feel, physically. Your vitals are stable and you need to feed as soon as you can. I want to let @JM_BDBFM in, because I know, that’s what you really need, but I won’t do it, until we’ll go through this, understand?

Xhex:
*finally clamping my jaw to stop the fucking pussy screaming shit, I lock my eyes on @DocJane_BDBFM, wanting to answer your questions, but not knowing how I can pull that off without another shrieking fit if I open my mouth. Nodding slowly, I really hope @DocJane_BDBFM you get @JM_BDBFM in here quickly, or better yet, get me out of here to him, as long as it doesn’t look like that lab.*

JM:
*@XhexBDBFM’s screaming had stopped… for now at least… but my struggles were in full force. Straining against @Vishous_BDBFM’s grip I continued my fight to get to my female. But the brother wasn’t letting up. Fuck. Letting my knees go weak, feeling defeated, and unworthy of any female, especially one like @XhexBDBFM, I sink to the floor and hang my head. A single tear escaped and traced a path down my cheek, dropping and hitting the linoleum floor below. I need my female. My @XhexBDBFM.* #BDB_FF

More waiting…
My stomach was reeling, and not because @Tohr_BDBFM forced more food down my gullet than I could handle. Nope. I was about to lose all of what I just ate because of my nerves over @XhexBDBFM’s condition. Back in the PT Suite, all I could do was wait for what I was praying was good news. About 20 minutes ago, I saw @EhlenaBDBFM_ running down from the main levels of the compound, and crashing through the doors that were obstructing my view of my female. I let out a string of silent curses as I reached both hands up into my hair and started to pull with more force than was probably necessary. I can’t fucking lose her. I just can’t. There’s no telling what I would do.
Looking to the clock on the wall, and seeing the second hand tick by with agonizing slowness, I stopped my pacing of the linoleum floors, and parked my ass in one of the most uncomfortable chairs I think I’d ever sat in, and waited.